As a long-time meditator and the creator of a mindfulness app, you might assume my life is stress-free. If only! The truth is, even though all my work for Sofa Spectacular is ultimately in service of reducing suffering and increasing well-being in others, it does have a toll on my own mental health.
In honor of this year’s Mental Health Awareness Week, which is themed around stress, I thought I’d share a candid look at what stresses I feel doing this work. I am, of course, incredibly fortunate and grateful to be doing this for a living. But the idea that just by having my meditation background and being able to share the practice through our app, I somehow have a pristine stress-free life is a fantasy.
I’ve learned over and over again that stress and difficulty are a core part of what it is to be alive. I’ve also seen the effect that practice has over time to increase your baseline of calm. But the punches do still come. And sometimes they land hard.
For me, one of the biggest stresses is dealing with technology issues. There are so many different Android devices running such a wide range of versions that it’s effectively impossible to make an app work smoothly across them all. Our developers are absolute rockstars, but it’s the inevitable nature of making software that bugs and issues arise, even after rigorous testing. Typically, I feel this in my body as classic fear and anxiety, with lurching of the stomach and tension across my chest.
Another major source of stress is dealing with negativity and criticism from customers. Whether it’s through email, social media, or reviews, we regularly receive messages that are difficult to read. The writers often don’t realize that it will be read by a fellow human who spends all their working day doing what they can to help them. We don’t outsource our customer service, so every single message is read by a core member of our team. When I read those borderline-abusive messages, I feel it as hurt in my stomach and chest. I also feel sad because it makes me wonder if the app has helped those people at all.
On a more personal level, the fact that meditation and my work have become so intertwined presents its own challenges. Meditation is a deeply personal thing to me, and it’s become less a thing I do and more a part of what I am. But now that it’s also my work, I have to work doubly hard to make sure I’m developing personally when it comes to mindfulness, not just professionally. Finding time for retreats, which has historically been an important part of how I’ve deepened my practice, has become a real challenge now that I have a young child.
And then there’s the stress that comes with running a small, self-funded business. Balancing the finances, staying visible in a crowded market, and wearing so many hats – as the business lead, product lead, and content lead – means I’m always in a state of over-stretch. This expresses itself as tension in my neck and upper back, feelings of doubt and overwhelm, and the occasional bout of jealousy towards larger, venture-backed apps.
Lastly, the blurring of boundaries between my personal and professional life has been a challenge. My wife Lucy is the female British voice in the app, which people tend to love. Working together has been a real delight, but it also means our family’s livelihood is tied up in the app, adding extra pressure. And as a core part of what I am, the app has become enmeshed with my personal identity in a way that can be tricky to navigate.
So those are the five main stresses I feel as a mindfulness entrepreneur. And over the years, I’ve developed a range of different ways to help me manage them. Meditation, obviously, is the first and most important tool in my toolkit. Through both formal and on-the-go practice, I work on my baseline of calm and stability, and also use specific techniques to deal with the various issues that arise.
I’m also grateful to have a small but mighty team that supports me and the business. Discussing challenges with them, getting their input, and celebrating successes together are crucial for my well-being. And maintaining strong personal relationships, both with my wife and with friends and family outside of the business, helps keep me grounded.
Ultimately, though, the most important thing has been cultivating self-compassion. Recognizing that stress and difficulty are a natural part of life, and that I don’t have to fight them or be perfect, has been truly liberating. It’s allowed me to be more honest, authentic, and resilient in the face of the inevitable ups and downs.
So if you’re an entrepreneur in the wellness space, or really any field, I’d encourage you to be honest with yourself and your team about the stresses you’re facing. And don’t be afraid to reach out for support, whether that’s through meditation, counseling, or just regular check-ins with trusted friends and colleagues.
Because at the end of the day, we’re all human. And maintaining a healthy, stress-free nest is just as important for us as it is for the people we’re trying to help. Sofa Spectacular is here to support you in that journey, whether it’s through the mindful furniture we offer or the community we’re building. After all, a calm, clutter-free space is the perfect foundation for a calm, clutter-free mind.